Happy Agent Co. - Real Estate Agent Podcast for Women - Hosted by Lindsay Dreyer, Real Estate Coach

From Stage to Sold — Dina Thomas on Designing a Life & Business You Love

• Lindsay Dreyer • Season 1 • Episode 45

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Can you really build a thriving real estate career while raising little kids and pursuing your creative passions? My guest today, Dina Thomas, proves it’s possible. Dina is a mom of two, a working actor in the DC theater scene, and a full-time real estate agent who got her license when her first baby was just six months old—in the middle of the pandemic.

In this episode, Dina shares her honest journey of:

  • Why she decided to get licensed during one of the hardest seasons of life
  • The role teams played in helping her learn the business (and why she went solo before coming back to a team)
  • How she managed childcare, acting, and ramping up her business without burning out
  • Why defining your own version of success is the only way to stay in this career long-term
  • The unglamorous truth about lead generation—and how real conversations beat paid leads every time
  • The importance of supportive partners, good childcare, and building a business that works for your family

This is a must-listen if you’ve ever felt the tug between career and motherhood—or if you’ve wondered whether you can create a real estate business that doesn’t swallow your life.

Connect with Dina:
📸 Instagram: @dbtrealtor

🎭 See her live at Roundhouse Theatre (Winter 2025) and Olney Theatre Center (Spring 2025)

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Speaker 1:

Today on the Happy Agent Co podcast, we're talking about building a business that fits your real life. My guest is Dina Thomas, full-time real estate agent in the DC area, part-time working actor and mom of two. She got licensed when her first baby was six months old and she ramped in the pandemic and has since built a steady, values-aligned business on her terms. We get into teams versus solo. What enough production looks like when you're juggling family and creative work, finding childcare and support, without the mom guilt and the unglamorous truth about lead gen. So this is a real conversation. If you have ever wondered whether you can do this and keep the parts of you that make you you, this is going to hopefully feel like a deep exhale, so let's dive in. Hey, Dina. Hi, I am really excited to have you. Welcome to the Happy Agent Code Podcast. Thank you for having me. Oh, anytime. So for our listeners who do not know you, can you give a quick intro?

Speaker 2:

Yes, my name is Dena Thomas. I live in Silver Spring, maryland. I'm a transplant from the New York New Jersey area. We moved to DC area around going on eight years ago and I'm a mom of two. I have a six-year-old daughter, orly, and a two-and-a-half-year-old daughter, penny, who I just remembered the other day. Her name is Penelope and I forgot. I named her that because I was like when has anyone ever called you Penelope? I saw it on her school stuff and I was like what? And I am a full-time real estate agent here in the area and I'm also, I would say, full, part time actor in the area as well. I perform all over DC and Maryland and Virginia at the various theater companies here in DC.

Speaker 1:

You are a busy woman. Yes, I am. Well, I was really excited to talk to you because I am all about women living their fullest lives and I really do believe that real estate is such an incredibly flexible career. Like, don't get me wrong, it's hard, but it is a flexible career that allows you to really pursue whatever your passions are like being a mom acting, being a real estate agent and so I want to really dive into kind of your journey and just what your experience has been. So let's start at the beginning. So where were you when you decided, oh yeah, I want to be a real estate agent? Like where were you in your life and like, what was that? Like little like inkling that was like I need to do this.

Speaker 2:

Well, when I was living in New York all those years ago, acting, I had a lot of friends who would double as real estate agents, meaning like in between auditions, things like that, they'd be showing, how you know, mostly rentals because we were in the city. But so I always like it was always in my ear because so many friends were doing it. But at that time I was working sort of in casting and acting and I was like I'm just going to put my focus there. And then we moved to DC and I was doing a couple shows, whatever, whatever.

Speaker 2:

And then the pandemic hit and I had a Orly was six months old when the pandemic hit and everything shut down and I called a friend of mine, you know we all kind of sat around and I lost. I had like two shows lined up and that I lost. You know, when the so I was like oh God, I'm not going to make any money. You know what's going on. And I called a friend of mine who was on the Zillow advisory board, who used to be an actor and kind of worked her way up, you know, and I said this is crazy. I was like, but is this a good time? Like should I maybe get my real estate license. I was like I'm home, I'm with my kiddo, I'm losing my mind. I think I'd be really good at this. I've always been interested in it. Am I nuts to want to do this now? And she was like no, I think you should absolutely do it now, if for nothing else, to give yourself something to focus on, to get yourself you know out of your head and you have a young baby and all this sort of stuff. And I said OK.

Speaker 2:

So within six weeks I got myself licensed in Virginia and she put me in touch with someone that she knew on the board who had a team here in Virginia, and that was my first team with EXP Realty here in the area. Stayed with them for a couple of months, realized it wasn't really the best fit for me, but met a great person on my team who moved to Compass. So I went with him to Compass and then, after spending a couple of years with him, kind of just broke out on my own and went over to Arla. And the beautiful thing was is, when I started it I was like, yeah, you know this will be great, like I will be able to be a mom and supplement you know some income.

Speaker 2:

And then I quickly learned, like, what real estate is. It was like trial by fire. I was just like, oh yeah, so like, and I realized, oh my God, like I can actually do this and this can be like a career, like a real career which is acting. You kind of always have a career but ish, because you're never really steady unless you're like steady, steady, you know, constantly working. So that's how I kind of I always was interested, but then during the pandemic I had the time to sit down and study and really plot out what I wanted my career in real estate to look like.

Speaker 1:

So I know there are probably a lot of moms maybe they're even listening where they're in the same boat. It's not pandemic era, but like they have a six month old, a one year old, a two year old at home and they had a previous career or they're kind of part timing right now and they're like OK, I think this is the career I want to, I want to jump into. So what advice do you have for them in terms of, like, ramping up your business? Like, do you recommend joining a team? Do you think going solo is a good idea? Like, what do you think are like two or three pieces of advice you would give to someone who's who is in your boat when you are home with Orly as a six month old?

Speaker 2:

I for me, personally, I think joining a team is a great way to start, primarily because there is going to be we learn a lot when you're studying for your tests et cetera, but this is truly, in my opinion, a learning by doing profession. You have to get into those contract negotiations, you have to understand oh wait, this thing popped up and I never read any chapters about that. Who do I? You need, so having a team there to bounce ideas off of, bounce questions off of, and I have since rejoined a team at Arla. I'm now on the district residential team because, again, I wanted that collaboration and being able to bounce ideas. Now all that is to say you can't. It's not that you won't get that as a solo agent, but my advice to someone just starting out is look for like-minded agents like you. Like my team, three out of the four of us are moms. So like we get what that means, we get sort of that hustle, we get that like sometimes you're going to have spit up on you and show up to a showing and like how we make that work. So that would be my first bit. Of advice is just for me join a team because you can tag along with someone. You can learn so much by watching and doing with that support system. No-transcript, it doesn't have to be.

Speaker 2:

I had, like this epiphany with my therapist a couple of years into real estate, which where I was like I don't want to be a 25 million to $30 million a year agent, don't need that life, I am very, very happy being a $10 million a year agent. Hell, some people might be like I'm just want to be a $5 million a year agent. I want to be a $5 million a year agent. I want to be a $3 million, whatever it is. That does not make your goals small. That does not limit you. You can morph the business for the life that you want and that is part of what's so attractive about it. If you want to be that $20 million, $25 million, $30 million agent, you're going to learn what it takes to do that and go for it. When my kids are in college or in school full time, maybe I'll want to be that agent, but right now I want to be home. I want to be able to act. So kind of finding your way to the business that you want is another piece of advice. And probably the last piece of advice I would say is just go bet on yourself.

Speaker 2:

I was so afraid to spend that money to start, like I don't want to pay for this license, I don't want this class. And my husband was like listen, if you, even in the first year, make back what you put into it, then we didn't lose anything. Like who cares? Like if you just say to myself okay, all in it was like $2,500 or whatever, it was like with my licensure and my classes and whatever, like he goes, then just make $2,500. Like, and even if you have to make it like hosting open houses for other people or like doing showings, like just make the $2,500 back. And guess what? I made more than $2,500. I made more than $2,500. So, yeah, just bet on yourself. Like, if you've got that hustler like go-getter feeling, honor it.

Speaker 1:

And like mom, no mom, like just go for it. I totally agree with you and I think a lot of times women are like, well, I don't know, and like I'll be honest, like having your first child is like a total mind fuck. Like like, well, I don't know, and like I'll be honest, like having your first child is like a total mindfuck. Like like total, where it like your confidence basically shatters through the floor, like I was a type A boss babe and it was like I had my first child and I felt like a total loser.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and you have no identity, none Like who the hell I'm a milk machine, if I'm breastfeeding, I know Like you're clinging on to me for survival, but like, what is my name? I don't remember my name. I don't remember how to function, of course, yep.

Speaker 1:

No idea. So, like I get that, like that's a really hard place to be in, and I think a lot of women decide to flip to a career in real estate when they're in that position because it's just like all right, I need to remake myself, I need to do something. And so I really love your advice, because it really is about just like I can do this and setting expectations on, like, what is my definition of success this year or this next six months, or whatever, All I have to do for this first year of real estate is get myself licensed, join a team and start doing showings.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and open housing. That's what I'll start doing. That sounds great. It doesn't have to be.

Speaker 2:

I think, in any business across the board, but also in real estate, there's this idea of what success looks like and that's fine. That can be someone's success, but that doesn't mean it has to be yours and that you're any less successful. Like right, exactly. Just like I hate those you know expectations. I'm like you make work for you what works for you. Period, stop the end. You don't have to justify that to anybody.

Speaker 1:

No, you really don't. And it's like you just have to be so confident in what is going to make you happy and what works for you, what works for your family, and like there's nothing wrong with making $60,000 a year, Like if you're loving that extra money that maybe takes your family to Disney and pays like pay some extra bills or whatever it's like that can be fun money and can also be a business that you're building.

Speaker 2:

So my husband and I in my first year we sat down and said what is the number I need to hit to like so that we can like comfortably pay our mortgage, so that, like between our two incomes, like we're comfortable, what is the number I need to hit every year? And then once we had that number, it was like, okay, I really want to get that number. And then anything past that is just right. Like does that go into the trip funds? Does that go into, like, saving for the school tuition fund? Does that go into the sometimes mom wants like a spa day fund? Does that go into the sometimes mom wants like a spa day fund? Does that go into the? You know we were working with some rescue organizations Like does that go into that fund, like whatever we want, but like we had that number. I think specifics are your friend, especially and especially when you're in a state of overwhelm, which we all moms are, I think, maybe all the time.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I mean. Well, that's just how it is when you have a busy full life that you love, You're going to stay overwhelmed Busy. So there's this tipping point, I feel like, where you get to the point of busy and you have to start bringing in childcare or assistance. So, like, how did you handle that flip? And where were you in your business? Like, if you can describe where you were at in your business, where you were like, okay, I got to get like actual daycare or actual preschool or actual like babysitters on board.

Speaker 2:

Well, I will say the first team that I joined and part of the reason why it wasn't a great fit is because it was a little too I came in going like I'm just going to kind of do this part time I am a six month old and it was not that team. That team was like, understandably so, like go, go, go, go, go, go go. And the first five or six months of my business my husband was like listen, there's a lot of real estate agents in this world who can't all be functioning like this, like this is insane. Like I would be throwing my kid in the bath and be like Zillow concierge is calling, I can't, I can't wash her, like I have to go, and my husband would be like whoa, whoa, like something is out of balance here. So what? The beautiful thing, actually really fast, that that team taught me is the life I didn't want to have in real estate. So when I made my next choice to go to Compass with my teammate from the previous team, that's when about so I would say like about a year-ish into working, and so my business was just starting to really move. I was starting to gain more clients. Slowly, friends were starting to learn I was doing real estate, people were trusting a little bit more.

Speaker 2:

I started bringing on babysitters because at that time there was nothing. Really I wasn't working enough for me to justify daycare to myself, like I didn't need Orly to be gone all day. I needed like a couple hours here, a couple hours there. And we have, knock on wood, been really fortunate. We've had several babysitters that have come in and out of our lives as the girls have been small to that have really really saved us.

Speaker 2:

And listen, that is a financial, that is a piece of this puzzle. That is tough. Babysitters are expensive and the good ones are more expensive. You don't want someone just sitting with your kid watching their iPad. And so, yeah, I would say it was about a year in that I really started trying to figure out okay, I need like 10 hours a week of help, or I need 15 hours a week of help. And then when Penny came along, I knew I needed a bit more help. It's also like when I'm in rehearsals for shows, right, I also need a lot of help, you know, during the days, because I'm rehearsing during the days. So it's been a steady stream of phenomenal babysitters, I would say over the last like four years, four or five years.

Speaker 1:

I think that that also goes back to investing in yourself and investing in your business, where I know so many women are hesitant to invest that money in childcare, or I've even seen where their partner is not supportive of that, which drives me insane, by the way, right.

Speaker 2:

Like no, you take your kid to your job every day. Take your kid to your job, exactly.

Speaker 1:

So I understand like sometimes you can bring your children, which is great, but there are some situations where you just can't bring your kids, especially when they're young, like they're unpredictable and they need you like a lot, exactly, and I mean listen, to be fair, I brought Orly to open houses and pennies, to showings, like, especially when they were young enough, that like they were not.

Speaker 2:

But now in the bucket, yeah, when they're in the bucket it's perfect. Now she's two and a half, like she's going to just rip off someone I know and like I can't trust her. Um, but to be fair, like Molly, my teammate, who just had her second child just a couple of weeks ago, she brings her boys everywhere and that totally works for her and and so everybody's got their own way of doing. You know that works for them. But I agree with you about the investment aspect. There is such a fear of and I still have it of spending money Like I'm like, oh God, do I really need to do that Like? Or even like I'm about to film some stuff, like shoot some more videos, and I was like, oh God, do I really need to spend this Like? But I'm like, you know what? Yes, because that deal I'm about to do or that client relationship I'm embarking on is going to cover these several months of childcare that I need in order to do this job.

Speaker 1:

It is a total mindset shift that has to happen and I think it is really hard because there's a lot of mom guilt around. I'm supposed to be here for my kids and I feel horrible that I'm bringing in someone else to raise my kids and it's like they're going to be fine, like as long as there was someone who is caring and loves them and like has nurturing activities.

Speaker 2:

It's like I almost feel like they're better for it, because they're interacting with other people Exactly, and that's the other thing is like the mom guilt is so real, it's so real and it's so hard. But then I'm also like I always and I have to like actually say it out loud because I feel so bad about it a lot of the time but I'm like I'm just giving my kids more people who love them and like one of my clients is like they are like our best friends and my kids they're like aunt and uncle, like we are like family and like they help out all the time. And I'm like they love, like we love their son and they love my girls. And it's like that was born out of real estate. You know what I mean Exactly.

Speaker 2:

And she became she literally was a client who was like, hey, I need a job, you need childcare help, can I help you? And I was like, yes, I love you so much as a client, like, come be my childcare provider, my kids love her. Like she's, like they are our family. So sometimes, as hard as it is, it is, there are like you gotta say yes Because you do have to say yes, you need, we need help. It's so hard.

Speaker 1:

It is really hard to admit that you need help, but you absolutely need help. Like I have another episode. It's like the support systems that all women need in real estate and like childcare, and like help around the house is like absolutely one of them. Like, if you want to make this a career, even like solid part-time career, you need help. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

You just we don't. We're not octopi, octopuses, we don't have like eight, we just don't. And there comes a point in time where you've just got to be like oh my God, because you know what? Also, when I was doing that for that team for the first couple months, I was a terrible mom because I was so stressed I was, even if I was laying with Orly in bed. I was like oh God if Zillow concierge calls like orally in bed. I was like oh God if Zillow concierge calls like I know my rates going to go down and someone's going to think like I'm not a proactive agent, she doesn't need that, mom, see I mean I'm crazy all the time, but like that was unhealthy.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's. That's like showing them what wrong priorities yeah, it's. It's like I also think like you're modeling entrepreneurship for your kids, like you're modeling how to be a mom that's present but also have a career, have things that fill you up, and I am really. That's something I'm really proud of myself and all moms who do this. Where it's like you're modeling this life for our kids, where I don't believe in you can have it all, but it's like you have choices and you don't have to choose between being a mom that's at home all the time, full time, which I had growing up, or being a mom that's like hyper-focused in this, like crazy, working like 80 hours a week. There is this like middle ground and you do get to choose. It's a choice.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I do. It is now, especially with Orly being six. She does, like you know, she did a video with me Like she was like please, let me do like a home tour. Like she was like please, and so, like she was like, I posted it on my social media and she was like walking in and she was like this is the room where we live in, called the living room, and she's like you see these closets, like, oh, base, and I'm like she's really like she's, she's having fun, like she's taking pride and she knows like this is what we're doing, you know. So, so that's become now, as they get older too. It's a way to kind of bond in that way of like right, like mom's not leaving you. Just I'm not leaving you to be like bye, I don't want to be your mom today. I'm leaving you because I'm doing something to help us and to help me, because I need something for me too.

Speaker 1:

Exactly. Yeah, it's. I am doing this because I like my job and I like going to work Exactly, and it also contributes to the family and it allows us to do a lot of great things Like. It allows us to build a life, a great life, so it's important they know that, I think it really is.

Speaker 2:

Me too, I wholeheartedly agree. And for them to see that.

Speaker 1:

I want to circle back to having a supportive partner, because I think it's something that we do not talk about at all is like the behind the scenes of what it's like to be married to a real estate agent. Right, it's like are you suffering, like how do you handle it? So like, what's your husband like? Like, what is your guy's relationship like and how do you feel like he supports your business?

Speaker 2:

He's the best. So we met. We were both actors when we met. We met in graduate school for acting and so we both ended up taking these like left turns and he's now a pediatric speech pathologist at one of the schools here in Montgomery County, at Flores Singer Elementary here in Silver Spring, and so he's got a very like he goes to work at this time, he comes home at this time but because we came from the acting world, he was used to me having super flexible like. I got to go to this audition. Now I'm going to take this job for six weeks over here, as we were kind of, you know, growing together before we had kids.

Speaker 2:

We were married for eight, eight years before we had kids, so like we had a long time of not having kids to kind of like figure out, yeah, um, I will say he's been, he's. He's always felt like I should have, like he was like. He always felt like I should have like a business that was mine. He was like you're just a strong person, you, you lead, he's like, and he always felt like I should have like a business that was mine. He was like you're just a strong person, you lead, he's like and acting, like we said, like you're constantly going into rooms where you're asking for people to give you value, and I want to go into rooms and give people value, you know, and help them, and so he's. He is very supportive, but he is also like a no bullshit. Like you're in, you're acting like an insane person, like you are an insane person and that's kind of where he was at. Those first couple months he was like you got to leave this team or we're going to end up divorced, because he was just like ugly as hell and then. But then, as I've morphed the business into more of what I have wanted, you know it does take a very confident, supportive person to be able.

Speaker 2:

He has, I am like, more of the breadwinner and more the worker in our house and he sometimes is with. Sometimes, depending on what's happening in the business and shows and things he's home with the kids a bit more and and we that's just what works for us Like he's got that fixed time at school and then he's home and the girls like are obsessed with him, which I love. He's meant to be a girl dad and and I can also be with the girls and then do the things that make me happy, which are working, which is working, and um, but he is wildly supportive. But also he's like a check yourself. Like if I'm like going real estate crazy and like doing this, that, and the other day he's like, girl, your head is 85 different places, you're not finishing a sentence, like call your transaction coordinator, call someone, and like get your shit together and like go upstairs and stop, and when you're ready to like not be a nightmare anymore, you can come back downstairs and I'm like, okay, you're not wrong, I love that.

Speaker 2:

And he's like there's nothing coming out of you that's making sense. So he's, he's a supportive check yourself at the door kind of guy.

Speaker 1:

I can totally see how that works and I think, like my my husband I wish would check my and I think, like my husband I wish would check me a little bit more. But he is like crazy supportive and you really do Like you need someone that you can be. Like hey got to go do a bunch of stuff on Sunday, like you won't see me for six hours and he's like okay, cool, I got you. And then he'll take the kids to the playground and like go take them lunch. Or like go do daddy day, which they are obsessed with.

Speaker 2:

Cool things too, though right that, like they don't. My girls you know he's. He's gone a lot of the day and so when they get a day of the weekend when I'm hosting opens or doing showings and they get their daddy time and if I'm hosting an open, like, they'll always pop by and so they what I'm doing too, you know if it's around here or whatever. But like it also is like it's building I love. People sometimes go like oh well, we're like forcing this on the fathers for the. I know, no, no, no, they're not your babysitter, they're a parent.

Speaker 1:

So they're a parent. Yeah, I really I think the only way to be supportive or like be successful in real estate and success again is up to you, but it's like if you have children your partner has to support your business in some form or fashion? No way. Yeah, like I've seen I'm on like a bunch of the Facebook groups for like moms in real estate and like I see way too often my husband's jealous of when I go on showings on the weekends and I'm like I'm sorry, what?

Speaker 2:

Like that would never occur Ever. You got to like my husband loves to ride his bike, so I'm like okay, so on Saturday, how about you get your three hour bike ride, whatever? And my showings? I worked with my you know, and if my clients are available in the afternoon, I'll schedule. Or, you know, I'll schedule in the afternoon. Like. I also work with clients who understand I'm a mom and a wife and who understand my boundaries and say like, okay, if the only time you can see something is 10 am, then you bet your ass will be there at 10 am. But if you have any flexibility for one to four instead, you work better with my day, if that's okay. And I think that is something that only comes with years of experience in the business, because in the beginning you're obviously you want to build your clientele, so you're just like whenever you can go, I'll go, I'll do everything. Yep, but now I'm like well, wait a sec. Is there a time that works for both of us and can we make that work?

Speaker 1:

for both of us and can we make that work? Yes, the time management and really just client expectation setting is such an important part of your business once you start to have kids and have a family, because there are days where maybe you're just like I'm not working on Saturday and that's just how it is, and your client doesn't need to. You just be like I'm booked Saturday. They don't need to know what you're booked with, they don't need to know it's your rest day or that you're like going to soccer.

Speaker 1:

I need my bed Right Got to be careful what you're posting on social media if you're friends with your clients yeah, you're like what and be like.

Speaker 2:

that's for my injury.

Speaker 1:

Exactly so. I know a like burning topic that a lot of people really are curious about, I think, whenever they see a success story like yours, where you're like I was able to go from six month old to like really great business is where did your clients come from? And like, how did you ramp up your data? Like your lead generation, Like obviously you are answering your Zillow calls Cause I think that's not very sustainable for anyone.

Speaker 2:

No, it is not. It's not the life you want to live.

Speaker 1:

Right. So like, where did your clients come from? And then what? Like how long were you in the business when you felt like you reached like a really good sustainable pace, where, like you, had consistent business coming in? I'm curious, tell us your secrets.

Speaker 2:

There aren't many secrets in the sense that I think every agent listen, some people get into this business and they just have like a Rolodex of people. That I didn't, especially because I came from the creative world with a lot of instead of W2 employees where a lot of like I-9, you know, like W-9 contractors were like actors, aren't known for making the most money. So a lot of it was like who's going to want to? Who can afford a house? Who's going to want a house? And my first, I would say two years, I barely had any listings, barely working with sellers. It was mostly buyers and how that started happening was a couple of things I started.

Speaker 2:

Social media for me has always been a really big tool because I'm comfortable on it. Luckily, I don't care about making an ass of myself. I just started posting a lot of stuff that was like this is what I'm doing and trying to make it more fun. And then I would go to my shows that I was doing and at like donor events I would be like here's my real estate, you know, car I started going on all the mommy groups and talking to all the moms. I would go over to our pool and say, oh my God, do you know that I just started real. I mean I was shameless. I was shameless about because I made a deal with myself that I wasn't going to sell myself to people, but I wanted everyone to know. But I was going to be like, pick me like the Meredith Gray, like pick me, choose. Oh.

Speaker 1:

I know, oh gosh, my daughter and I are watching Grey's Anatomy right now and it is pathetic. I know but that it is, so I know you're just like, oh, meredith.

Speaker 2:

Oh no, meredith, no, you're worth, but also like you're meant to end up with Derek, but like I don't spoilers, you know I, oh my gosh, but I just wanted everyone to know. And so then I started getting a couple people like in the theater world, like directors or people who would start, or like artistic directors, people who worked in the admin. People started, you know, kind of reaching out. So it started in my theatrical world and then for me it really started with word of mouth. I was a word of mouth girl. I am a big believer in just authenticity. Like I am not for everyone, I am fully aware of this fact. I might not be for you, that is okay. But if I'm for you, like it's going to be a match and like we're going to become friends and like my relationships just started to flourish and I started. And then I did something separate, which I don't know if everyone knows about this program, but I started this. I want to say, like year three of my business, I started doing the Redfin partner program, oh yeah, where you have to like get accepted into it but you become like a partner agent, meaning when people sometimes search Redfin, they sometimes get referred to you in a certain zip code or area and it's. You don't pay upfront for it, but if you do end up doing a deal and closing a deal, redfin gets a referral fee.

Speaker 2:

When I started, you know, for every 50 messages there might be one or two that were legit, but I started building up my client base that way and I will tell you that I don't feel like my business really started being consistent. I'm in the year I got licensed, in August of 2020. So now I just passed my five years and I will tell you I did not feel consistent until this year. Truly, I think that's a misconception that people have, that it's going to be like what I get going I'm off to the races and some people are, Some people are, some people just have that book of business and they have their hands in a lot of different places and they just know people and people. I'm not knocking that at all. Good for you. For me it was. I have now my first time clients are selling again or buying again, or, and now I'm starting to see a lot of repeats and I'm having a lot more referrals come in. So for me it did not feel steady really until this last year of my business.

Speaker 2:

But I think lead gen everyone obsesses over lead gen and they pay for leads and for me it was just about talking about what I was doing sponsoring, where I could sponsor, even on the playground, like with the mom through school. I'm like who'd you use to sell your house? Oh, I know them. They're great. Is anyone in your neighborhood selling? I'm really trying to build my business. You're there with a bunch of moms who are trying to do the same thing. I just started talking and social media. I love doing videos. I just love that stuff. A lot of my business, especially referrals to and from other agents, came from social media.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, Thank you. I honestly thank you for being honest, because I there is this misconception that, like you're just going to kill it your first year you're so not in my experience, I mean, I've been doing this 21 years and in my experience, well, mine is a little bit different because I had, like I had gone from new construction where I had like a book of business. I had clients that loved me and I've parlayed that into referrals, so like for me it was. I did six million my first year like as an agent?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I did, but that was because I, like had pretty much already been agenting light and I had a head start. But the agents that I've trained or that I've seen coming in and out of the business, it's like I tell them it's like if you can hit your three, you're good, like that's kind of when you have you've seen enough deals, you've like you got your confidence and that's when you're just like you're good. Something you said I want to reiterate, because there's actually two things you said we're like. So on the same wavelength about this. So it's. The first is being shameless. That is so important. People don't talk about being in real estate and you don't have to push yourself or sell yourself.

Speaker 1:

It's literally about letting people know what you do for a living, and it's like, if they don't, it's like being a secret agent. Like we don't want secret agents, like we want to be known, and the mom group thing is like such an untapped resource, I think, for so many people. And then it's like you were out there having conversations, which is the second thing I want to reiterate. It's like, first of all, you have to be shameless, you have to want to get business, and the second thing is you have to have conversations. Like there's a stat out there that you have to have 50 conversations a week to get one appointment. And so it's like Believe that yeah, if you aren't having and if you're really excellent at having conversations, you're probably going to have two or three appointments. But it's like 50 conversations a week equals one appointment. And then it's like so if you have 52 appointments a year, how many of those are going to convert to a sale? Probably 10 to 15.

Speaker 1:

It's literally the most simple thing on earth and I am in and it's human. Yes, I'm obsessed. You did it.

Speaker 2:

Oh, scared that that if they tell anyone they're going, that they work in real estate or whatever, that the person's automatically go. I'm not, I'm not buying, I'm not telling and it's like, and they might OK, then your response is yeah, I wasn't asking.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I almost think they're scared. They're going to say, yes, let me work with you, because agents that are new don't know what the hell they're doing, or they don't feel like they know what they're doing.

Speaker 2:

That's so great, I can't believe. You brought that up. I've been thinking of selling.

Speaker 1:

I'd be like yeah, what's next? Oh shit.

Speaker 2:

Oh, now I will tell you the little seeds. Like my neighbor just called me a few days ago and was like, hey, we're thinking of selling in like a year. She didn't talk about using me. Oh, she will, but you never know. And she was like could you come over and just like walk through the house and tell us some things we might need to like start thinking about, you know, working on before we get ready, which I did. She just knows I do this because we're in the backyard or she hears me negotiating, like I haven't actively ever been. Like hey, when you're ready to sell, I'm right next door. It's just life. We are in life. Like you can be a person and just have these conversations about. And then what?

Speaker 2:

For me, what I always do, what I felt was so helpful with social media, was there's a healthy amount of real estate content and just like mom content yes, we're all dying inside, sometimes Totally so like if I'm like tell someone, oh my God, like, so, like I had a mom come up to me at the pickup the other day and I did this dumb, dumb reel the other day where I was like dancing to this like hip hop song, and then I was like.

Speaker 2:

I was like there's two versions of you know me. And it was like and then I was like, hi, welcome to my open house. And it's like that. She's like I didn't even know you did real estate. She's like that just came up on my page because, like I search like mom stuff and I like we're in the same town so like she's known me for a couple of years yourself, you got to be unafraid to put yourself out there, otherwise you have to be ready to spend a fuck ton of money on leads that are going to. I'll tell you 90, excuse me, 90% of my friends who buy leads do not find that to be a fruitful endeavor.

Speaker 1:

Oh no, and it's so expensive. I mean, it's crazy expensive and spendy and you have to be on call all the time. You're paying for two leads, basically for the month, and if you don't, answer it in legit, like good leads.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, no, you're going to get so many more leads. I'm a big believer in ask the barista how they're doing, not because you want to sail, because we live in a really scary world and conversations lead to all sorts of things. Ask the grocery checkout person how their day is going. Don't know where these conversations go, and I'm also all about the fact that, like we as people need to connect more right now and remind each other that we're human and and then your business will just grow. It sounds so cliche, but it will. But I'm also here to tell you, five years in, this is the first year I felt that.

Speaker 1:

Right, but it also it's like all those conversations, all the being shameless, all the investing in yourself, like all of that stuff is coming to a head and honestly, dina, like I would say that if you had like really jumped in and like full-timed it, like in the first year or two, you'd be where you are now, but you had to take it at your own pace.

Speaker 2:

So the only way- to make this business sustainable. There's a reason that people quit by the time they get to the end of year two because they haven't done it in a way that they can sustainably continue to survive and be a member of a family or happy or fulfilled in any way. You have to if you want money fast, real estate is not for you. You might get a deal but everyone thinks like, oh yeah, it's like I'll make money so fast. No, you won't. You have to build it like any other startup.

Speaker 1:

Yep, like any other business, it really is. And I think social media is like a blessing and a curse right. It has all of these people who are showing their successes in their first year, in their second year and you're seeing how easy real estate is, and I think it's actually a really bad thing. That we do to the general public is like we show how easy it is. It's like actually bad that we're doing that, but like they don't see all of the intentional hard work that's happening behind the scenes. And it really is like it's consistency and it's showing up in the way that you can show up that you're able to no matter, like what your life is like, and you just have to do it.

Speaker 2:

And I'm a big believer in like I know that everyone's got these like polished reels and this like look how much I spent on this videographer to look like that's fine, cool. Go have the accounts with 50K, 100k. That's great, good for you. Who knows how many deals they're actually doing, as opposed to just spewing out content?

Speaker 1:

We don't know, but I'm I think they're also trying to build a downline. Honestly, like a lot of those like, yeah, it's more of a building an agent downline than actually selling real- estate, a lot of them, as much as it is downline.

Speaker 2:

I'm a big believer in the mascara smudged. I just, you know, wiped four toilets at my upcoming listing because you know they're covered in God knows what. And I'm a big believer in and then saying like, and this is what we do too, and that's OK Like you're sleeping away at your desk with this report that you have due at whatever time for your boss. I'm at this listing till 11 o'clock at night so that these floors shine for these photos, because who knows it will help. But I hope it'll help and I want it to help for my seller. You know it's not.

Speaker 2:

I think social media, when used for its good and this is across the board, not just real estate, this is just when social media is used for the power of good, it can be amazing. It really can. People's lives, if it's used for good, is amazing the world that we live in. When social media is used poorly, as it's so often, it is one of the most dangerous tools that we all have at our disposal, and I think that's for business and for life. Use it in a way that can be helpful, but life, use it in a way that can be helpful, but don't use it in a way that can be destructive.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I totally agree. This has been such an incredible conversation. I think it's going to be helpful for a lot of people.

Speaker 2:

honestly, I hope people can realize that you can do. I never gave up my passion for acting to do this. I never gave up my passion for being a mom to do this. You just have to believe that you can find. We're all striving for balance and some days you're going to be more balanced than others, but you can find a way to make this business work for you. It just takes give yourself patience and grace that you will find that.

Speaker 1:

Beautiful. I couldn't have said it better myself.

Speaker 2:

Thank you.

Speaker 1:

It's like literally my reason for being.

Speaker 2:

I'm like yeah, and then you watch like I'll get off this and I'll be like and fuck this and I can't. That's why I love you Really. Good therapist I would die for true therapist I would. I will give a shout out to good therapy for my therapist.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, we need support again. It's like the support systems every mom needs All right, so if people just loved everything you had to say where can they find you?

Speaker 2:

Well, you can find me. I don't really go on Facebook anymore. I'm all tired of Facebook. You can find me on Instagram at at DBT Realtor, and I'm also that's also what I am on TikTok. And if you want to see me live, you can visit me at an open house or come see me. This year I'll be at Roundhouse Theater in Bethesda in the winter and I will be at Only Theater Center in the spring. I can't say the shows yet, but I will be acting this year quite a bit, so I can talk about selling your house while you come, and if you're a client, you always get a. I'm doing another event. I always do client events. They get free tickets and they come. We do a whole big event and it's always so much fun at the theater.

Speaker 1:

Oh my gosh, good job, mixing business and pleasure. Business and pleasure. All right, deanna, thank you so much.

Speaker 2:

Thank you, lindsay, you're the best. This is so fun.

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Lindsay Dreyer

Host